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Starting the Journey?

Well, what the hell?

 

I decided to start a blog to kind of journal our discussion and possible first steps into swinging. I am the female of the couple (let's call me Lilly). I titled this blog the way I did because of the fact that we are just beginning to talk about this, and talk about what we want to do. The purpose of the blog will be to look back easily and see how our thoughts and conversations have progressed as time goes on.

 

1 week ago, I asked my SO what he thought about the idea of swinging. It was something I had thought about for quite a while over the last year and I was curious what he thought about it. My SO (let's call him Hyde... just cause I always loved Hyde from "That 70's Show"... yes, I am a total, weird dork). The decision to finally ask his thoughts about it came from the excitement he and I both had during and after visiting Exxxotica in Denver earlier this year. It was the first time either he or I had ever attended an expo like this, so it was definitely a new and exciting experience. During our visit at the expo, we met an amazing girl at one of the booths there for a local strip club. She gave us tickets to get into the club free, so we decided to go that night. This was the second first for both of us - being in a strip club. That was definitely very different, to say the least.

 

Over the past week, Hyde and I have talked a bit here and there about swinging, and doing a ton of research about the lifestyle. Good grief, there are a shit-ton of opinions out there, and a shit-ton of advice. We began to talk about how many different points of view there are, and how we would never really understand what our "rules" should be, or how we would even feel about trying swinging until we experienced something of it. Note: This does not mean that we have not already spoken about rules and boundaries of our own - we are just unsure of how many, what kind, and how far they should go at this point.

 

I started looking at some different LS social sites for us to get some more exposure to others in the LS, as well as to find out what clubs there might be in Colorado. Yay for a very vanilla state - except for marijuana! (Sarcasm doesn't translate well through text, so imagine that spoken in a way that it positively drips with sarcasm...) Of the few places in the state, there is one that intrigues us both - Voodoo Leatherworks - and we have discussed attending one of the orientations next month, or later, depending on how much more comfortable we become with the idea. We are both intrigued, excited, and extraordinarily nervous and unsure of ourselves. Obviously - who wouldn't be nervous or scared about such a big step/change?

 

Historically, we have had some issues in the past. We are fully aware of the fact that these are things we need to discuss at length before swapping (either soft or full), and that we need to discuss our feelings about the past and what we might get into in the future. The good news is, we have always been a great couple together, and seem to mesh completely differently than anything either of us have ever experienced, so we are pretty damn comfortable talking with most things with each other. But we are very interested to experience something about the LS before trying anything. I also think I need a little more exposure to the LS before I can really begin to face any fears or other feelings that I will need to address with Hyde.

 

I can say I was very happy to find a "smaller" site like Kinkster. The larger sites seem so overwhelming and over-populated that I would have no idea how or where to begin there. We are registered on a couple of the larger sites too, but I keep coming back to Kinkster because it is much more comfortable for me. I do want to thank the admins of this site for making it so user friendly, and I hope that we might begin to support the site if we continue down this path. 

 

If anyone decides to read this, thank you! We would welcome any "newbie" tips and ideas during this first phase.

 

InsanePenguins 04.19.2017 5 280
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  •  MaestroDiRosaLuv: 
     
    The one piece of advice we would give is to always remember, your relationship comes first and everything else is secondary. Always talk, be close and stay united. Have fun, but always keep that in mind.
     
     04.22.2017 
    1 point
     
  •  Delinquent-duo: 
     
    Good luck sex kitten
     
     04.19.2017 
    1 point
     
  •  Delinquent-duo: 
     
    Wow, this was a very well written disertation :-) The wife and I have been in the lifestyle community for a few years and one of the biggest mistakes people make is not communicating with one another. Next getting into lifestyle world will not fix relationship issues! For us, playing with other couples or single girls strengths our connection while filling my wife's desire to be with another woman (bi). Good luck and make sure you set rules and boundaries you both agree with
     
     04.19.20172 replies2 replies 
    2 points
     
    •  Ampm: 
       
      I would say it can strengthen your relationship. There are no secrets when you're communicating.
       
       5 days ago 
      0 points
       
    •  InsanePenguins: 
       
      Thank you! We are very aware that this isn't a way to "fix" us, which is why we are starting very slow. And yes, we definitely know the power and necessity of boundaries. :-)
       
       04.19.2017 
      0 points
       
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