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Active Brain = Active Submission

This post is one that we read on another kink site but it is most definitely worth sharing.  We hope others enjoy it as much as we did.

Active Brain = Active Submission

by dove

This is part rant, part clarification, part frustration. Don't feel targetted because this is aimed at nobody in particular.

I was new once. I'm still new in many respects. I made plenty of mistakes. The biggest mistake I made (so far) was a doozy. For some unknown reason I threw logic out the door when I first discovered D/s and decided that it was a completely different world. What I knew in my "vanilla" life no longer counted and I was now going to do everything differently because this was D/s!

Umm ... well ... I hate admitting when I'm wrong. But I was so wrong that it is laughable today. We are born with a brain and we start developing that organ very early in life. There is no excuse on this earth - including D/s (yes yes I can hear the gasps) - to stop exercising that brain.

Are you a mother? You know how a child prefers this glass and these toys? Some dominants have these kinds of preferences too - their toys are different is all.

Have you ever had someone over for coffee, asked them how they like their coffee and then prepare it for them? Wonderful - you can serve!

Have you ever looked for something under a piece of furniture - where your head is under the coffee table? Great - you know how to kneel! Just be a bit more graceful.

Want training for bondage or a single tail scene? Don't move. End of lesson. No charge.

If your neighbour wants to build a fence around his property but has decided that he wants to build it 10 feet into your property, do you think you might be able to say no? Yay - you can stand up for yourself!

If this same neighbour agrees to build the fence on his property after all and wants to paint it green, can you tell him that you don't like green but a walnut brown would be good? Awesome - you can negotiate!

Has your car ever broken down and you were alone? Did you manage to get home somehow? Have you ever been alone at home and made yourself something to eat? Way to go - you can take care of yourself!

Have you ever paid rent? Do you pay your phone bill? Do you pay for groceries? Good - you're responsible!

Have you ever had an important guest at your house? Auntie Ethel from overseas, or the mayor and all the good dishes come out? Have you ever been to court (as a spectator only I Hope!) or been at a banquet? Wow - you know some protocol!

Have you ever felt that you wanted to make someone smile so you did some random act of kindness? Way to go - you can please someone!

Have you ever read the dosage on a bottle of pills or read the warning labels on some cleansers? Perfect - you like to be risk-aware and safe!

Get the picture yet? I didn't at first. Maybe I'm alone in making a fool of myself when I first discovered D/s. Maybe there's one other dove out there who might make the same mistake?

Ladies - none of what we do is rocket science. You don't need a degree or a pilot's licence or a lobotomy. What makes you a vibrant woman and an active part of life is EXACTLY what makes you a vibrant and active submissive. THAT'S IT! Honest!

Take what you know and apply it to D/s or S&m or BDSM or whatever floats your boat. What - you - know. What we do is an expression of OURSELVES. It's not some idyllic fantasy or fairy tale. It's part of what makes us work and it's pretty simple.

I turned my brain off and that ended up biting me in the ass. When I finally figured out that my intelligence didn't have an "off" switch and that what I knew could actually make me a good submissive, things became a lot simpler. If I can get a message through to just one person I'd tell them not to waste their time trying to reinvent the wheel.

Who we are is what got us this far in life. Guess what - it's going to get us through the rest of our lives too. WHO WE ARE. Not who the perfect submissive is - WHO WE ARE.

End of rant